How's it hanging? Leslie: Listen, we need to break Ron from her spell! Can't you just move your butt around or wear a dress made out of meat? Tammy Two: Well I could do all of those things, and have, but that bitch is crazy. Who's this? Who's this tall drink of water? Andy: Andy. Leslie: Basically we are being attacked by Godzilla, and to beat Godzilla, we need Mothra. Leslie: You.gold digger! You are literally a gold digger! But I had to learn about his finances to make sure my future was protected. Is this audit even real? Tammy One: In a sense, yes, but in another, truer sense, no, it is not. Tammy may I use the restroom? Tammy One: Remember to wash your hands! Leslie: Okay, you know what? Let's cut the crap. Ron: Don't worry Leslie, Tammy's totally cool. Tammy One: He wants me here, he invited me.
Leslie: I was hoping to speak with Ron alone. Right my love? Tammy One: Stop fidgeting. Anything you say will stay between you and me.
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Leslie: Ron there are some things I want to speak to you about but I'm not quite sure how to phrase them. When she explains it, it makes total sense. Leslie: Oh! That's great! And how is that gonna help? Ron. Yesterday she converted my bank account into a joint bank account with hers. What? Leslie: What is going on? Where's Tammy one? Ron: She moved in with me. Leslie: What? Ron: Hey Jer! Hump day am I right buddy? Jerry. Ron: Good morning everyone! Leslie: Good morning sir! How can I help you? Ron! Your mustache fell off! Ron: Hahaha Leslie you goofball! Tammy pointed out that my face looked better without any hair on it and it did collect a lot of food crumbs which is very unsanitary. Tammy One: Now! You're not getting any younger. It's super fun- Tammy One Oh, you and Ron have a big meeting huh? I'm sure Ron will remember the meeting fondly while he makes toilet wine in a Federal prison in Terre Haute. Leslie: Uh.I.I'm just wondering how long that's going to take because Ron and I have a very important meeting together. Knope! Leslie: Yes!? Tammy One: You're going to go to payroll and get copies of Ronald's workplace expense reports. Tammy One: Andy, you're going to collect all of this and you're going to put it in my car. Is that necessary? Tammy One: Oh are we playing a game where everyone says something stupid? Everyone. I'll need access to all of your accounts. We'll do a complete overhaul of your finances. Tammy One: Good God Ronald! This is a much bigger mess than I imagined. I am Leslie Knope, Deputy- Tammy One: I don't think it will be necessary for you to speak again while I'm here. Leslie: Hello! I don't believe we've met. Ben: I would guess that they'll be bankrupt by the end of.this sentence!
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Ben: If you don't mind me asking, how much are they paying you? Model: $100,000 a year! With full medical. Are you the receptionist? Model: I guess. My Mom's name is Tamara.she goes by Tammy.īen: Umm hi. Andy: Honey, your breasts look amazing! Ron and Tammys Leslie: Ron, this is a Federal tax audit. Tammy One: Sit up straight! You're not doing your breasts any favors.
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But as you're so fond of saying, it's a free county. Or perhaps guilt for all the times I tried to smother you in your sleep. Tammy One: Then why is your mustache trembling? Ron. What do you want? Tammy One: You remember what I do for a living I trust? Ron: Yes. I was distracted by the largest penis I have ever seen.
I actually don't even know if he has mumps forgot to look. Harris: That man has the largest penis I have ever seen. Perd Hapley: There you have it, where 'it' is the thing Leslie Knope just said about this situation.ĭr. Ron: Also, I keep a sizable supply of ground chuck in my desk. Ron: No, my other ex-wife Tammy - Tammy One. Leslie: Yeah, I saw her in the courtyard. Leslie: Ron! Hey, whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa, Ron-Ron-Ron-Ron-Ron, what's going on? Ron: My ex-wife is back.
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